A Day in the Life: Wednesday Edition

Today was a typical Wednesday. Here's a play-by-play rundown. It probably won't be as exciting as Tim Tebow's multiple touchdowns, but whatever.

600am – wake up, take a shower, do morning-related things

630am – discover I can't find the van keys

630.50 – panic

633am – find the van keys

635am – get the van out of the lot that our pupusa stand neighbors let us use (they are so nice!), get on the Interstate

645am – drive on the Interstate. Manage to not kill self or anyone else.

655am – arrive at Whole Foods in Berkeley and pick up past-dated cakes and breads for donation

725am – drive on the Interstate. Manage to not kill self or anyone else.

745am – put away breads and stuff. Take a nap.

900am – hit 15 minute snooze.

915am – realize that I shouldn't have hit snooze. Put beans on to soak and cook.

930am – chill out in the kitchen and put on some Pandora or YouTube music. Cut up onions, dilly-dally around

10am – realize that I shouldn't have dilly-dallied, and that people will want food in an hour. Run around the kitchen like a crazed maniac, alternating between washing/peeling/cutting potatoes, cooking spaghetti, sauteeing onions, stirring beans, putting out cups/plates/forks

1045am – finishing touches on everything

11am – doorbell rings. Bring plate of food. Check Facebook in down times. Repeat roughly 30 times, until 2pm.

215pm – clean up the kitchen, wash dishes, put away food, etc. Reach into drain trap to clear food from drain. Grimace and squirm and think of gross things. Drain traps are literally the most disgusting things on the planet, and that's coming from a CNA in a nursing home. I hate them so much.

230pm – sweep ALL THE THE THINGS

330pm – mop ALL THE THINGS in the basement. Watch as a resident with dirty shoes walks down my recently-cleaned and still-wet hallway. Clean bathrooms, wipe down showers, sinks, clean toilet, take out trash.

415pm – haul mop bucket upstairs. Drag hose upstairs and put it in the bucket. Tromp downstairs to turn the water on. Tromp upstairs to check the level of the water. Tromp downstairs to shut the water off. Tromp upstairs to mop ALL THE THINGS on the second level. Doorbell rings 3x, signaling a resident who wants in. Walk in dirty shoes down recently-mopped and still-wet stairs. Watch as resident in dirty shoes walks up recently-mopped and still-wet stairs. Continue mopping.

445pm – hang mop up to dry, knowing that it will never truly be dry and is a germ-filled bastion of all things disgusting. Carefully walk down back stairs with heavy, water-filled mop bucket. Get splashed repeatedly with black mop water. Rinse out mop bucket and mop-water-splashed arms.

500pm – collapse. Check Facebook.

530pm – start on supper. Get great ideas about delicious and interesting foods that are not rice and beans!!

630pm – serve supper. Watch residents eat only rice and beans and tortillas and not the delicious and interesting not-rice-and-beans food that you just prepared.

715pm – clean up, wash dishes, take out trash, clean up the kitchen. A clean kitchen is a happy kitchen!

800pm – watch a movie with Maria and Juan. Listen to Maria fall asleep and snore halfway through.

10pm – finish movie, go to my room and dink around on the Internet.

1130pm – go to bed.

So there you have it. Significantly less exciting than an ESPN radio announcer's version of Payton Manning and the Denver Broncos, but if my life were that interesting, I would have a more disposable income.  

6B - I hope you liked the multiple (3!!) sports references contained within.