It feels like my eyeballs are bleeding

You know that feeling when you're so tired you feel like your eyeballs are bleeding? That's totally me right now. If I am conspicuously absent from Facebook tomorrow, it's because I've died of exhaustion and am decomposing in my bed. Vivid imagery. You're welcome.

Here's a rundown of the last two days:

Wednesday

610 – wake up, shower, leave for Berkeley Whole Foods to pick up past-dated cakes and bread.  Decide (as I do every week) that it's really not safe for me to be driving in such a half-awake condition.  

715 – return, put away all cakes/breads/pies

730 – 910 – nap.  Try to, anyway.  Neighbors and DP bringing in noisy rolling trash bins keep interrupting.  

915 – start cooking the noon meal

11 – 2 – serve the noon meal.  Run up and down the stairs approximately 85,299 times. 

2 – 3 – clean kitchen, sweep/mop floors and main staircase

3 – 430 – catch up on Hulu shows, nap

430 – 7 – cook/consume supper. Made ham/green bean/potato soup and cheese-stuffed jalapenos. Very successful.

730 – 830 – early Valentine's day celebration at Fenton's Creamery with Ben.  Delicious cookie/ice-cream combo involving cookie dough, actual baked cookie, chocolate chunks and syrup, and vanilla ice cream. 

830 – 1130 – travel to and work for lady with cerebral palsy. First day on my own.  Did pretty well.  Only had to ask for a couple of clarifications/next-step-type things.  Finish everything early (like a BOSS) and leave unexpectedly early.

1130 – catch #1 bus at BART station. Ride it all the way home for $2.

1230 – bedtime.

Thursday

740 - alarm.  snooze. 

800 – shower, accidentally miss unloading the produce truck from the Food Bank.  Oops. 

830 – 1030 – do nothing

1030 – pass out numbers to people standing in line. Get mobbed. Lose some faith in humanity's ability to share resources

1030 – unload van and 2 pickups full of produce/bread/canned goods

1115 – 100 – Distribution. May have finally conveyed to the Asian portion of the line exactly how the number system is supposed to work. Maybe. Hopefully things should go a little smoother now. Maybe.

115 – clean up sidewalk, eat leftover pupusas from our very gracious neighborhood pupusa stand

230 – guest interview. Guy walked all the way here from southern Mexico. 7 day hike, I guess. Fell asleep in the office chair.

310 – leave for work at the clinic. Arrive late.

330 – 8 – Clinic

815 – 1030 – dink around on the Internet

1030 – pick up Maria from BART station. Assume my day is finally done.

1045 – someone taps on my window with a fingernail from the outside. Repeatedly. Creepy as all hell. Decide “better safe than sorry, what if someone genuinely needs something?” and open the window. Neighbor tells me the lights in the van are on. Know that they probably aren't, but again, “better safe than sorry.”

1100 – check van lights. They are off.

        And the worst part?  I have to do this every week until I leave one or more of these jobs.  I know, I know, I totally signed up for it.  Made the bed, gotta lie in it, that's how it works.  And I really can't complain too much.  Thursday really wasn't so bad. It was mostly the combination of Wednesday + Thursday that makes me want to keel over and die. I did this ALL THE TIME in high school, college, and this past summer. I worked  regular 16 hour days this summer, I worked the rough equivalent of full time + classes in college, and I was out of the house from 7am to 930pm in high school. I must be getting old or something. Out of practice. Guess I'll have to start adopting the “young at heart” motto or something.  Get an AARP membership and senior citizen discounts at Costco.  Start buying 12-packs of SmartBalance butter.  Get a chain for my glasses.  Start wearing shoulder pads and clip-on costume-jewelry earrings (but maybe that is actually considered "hip" nowadays?)  Start stuffing my sleeves with Kleenex.  Documenting my daily poops and obsessing over their regularity and consistency.  Crochet afghans out of brightly-colored orange yarn.  Start using words like "gee whiz!"  "tarnation!" and "holy mackerel!"  Jeez, I'm such a geezer.

         I'm going to sleep in like an Olympic champion tomorrow. Like it's my m-f JOB.